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Wishful Thinking


Did you ever look at yourself in the mirror?

You tell yourself your pretty.

You do your hair, your makeup.

You lift your shirt up and think, are you feeling skinny, bloated, or fat?

Can anyone relate, like a few days before you get your period, you are the skinniest, because I get that.

Thats your best day. The next day “rolls” around your like shit. (Pun intended)

It was the spaghetti that I had two plates of.

This isn’t cool.

But I will keep telling myself I’m fat and do nothing about it, like work out.

I could just do that right?

But who the fuck has that motivation anymore?

Then you scroll Facebook and see that beautiful girl with those nice abs she worked for.

That will be me someday.

I just know it. This girl is my inspiration.

Then as you think of that, your like nahhh photoshop. It’s not true.

Plus your a mom of two. Do people really have those nice abs after two kids? Yes.

No. Lol it’s unrealistic. No it’s not.

I try and talk myself out of every scenario of what it could be. Then I sit here and bitch about it.

I’m just going to take it or leave it.

Fuck no I’m not. I have my beer in one hand, which I enjoy, and my insecurities in another.

I will leave it, but I’m going to still bitch about it till I randomly loose a pound.

Or gain.

Who knows.

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I’m a mess, a loving, caring, working, try to put my makeup on everyday, always smiling or to exhausted to function, mess. But it’s okay I wouldn’t change it for the world. Follow my journey, you and I will figure things out together!

21 Comments Join the Conversation

  1. Very very honest post. We’ve all unfortunately been there.

    Thank you for following me 😊



  2. Hahahaha! Amen! I was there until I took on yoga, which is the easiest way to make you feel good without exerting too much energy. It aligns your whole shit and because your mind is at peace, you start to want to eat things that make you feel energized rather than sluggish, and BAM! you lost 5 pounds in a week and you didn’t even realize. Even if you don’t lose weight, you’ll notice that you’re becoming more toned. (Booty lifts, arms tighten, thighs curve, waist shrinks) I’m not kidding either. This is real shit.

    You should try it! Get the Down Dog app and do like a 20 minute session 3 times next week and see how you feel. You can even do just 10 minutes. Whatever works for you.

    I was hella busy when I started, but I loved it so much, I say “f*ck all yall, I gotta do yoga. Me time. Oh yes. Me time bitches.” And now i do it for 30 minutes every weekday. More if I’m stressed.

    If you can’t get the app, just find any video doing yoga poses. But the app has great music that motivates you instead of putting you to sleep.

    If you try it, let me know how it worked for you.

    Good luck, love! 💚

    Liked by 2 people


  3. Wow, you sound just like me. I’m a mother of two boys. I’m self employed in a crazy industry so my schedule is chaotic. Now…my weight fluctuates a lot every month. After two boys and four pregnancies, my body changed a lot. But I was able to get abs. Didnt keep them. But I’m determined to get fit again. Yes those photos are photoshopped. I know first hand and as a witness. Also, many fitness models take low doses of steroids. Which definitely makes the difference. But they don’t tell you that. I know from second hand experience. I’m saying all this to say that you’re correct. Even about the painful truths. I try to tell women who asked about my weight loss (which took about freaking 3yrs to lose then I gained a lot back) to trust me when I say, those photos are photoshopped like nothing you’ve seen before. They can extend your legs and make you taller, change eye and hair color, nose shape, etc. Literally anything. They can add a donkey head and smooth it out to look like a hybrid creature. But back to the main point. This is a journey. And your post is a part of the process. When you sit down with your beer, that is part of every moment that will take you to your goal. Not every moment will be lollipops and gum drops. Some moments will feel frustrating, depressing, ugly, shameful, and even heartbreaking. This experience is necessary. When you get to that goal this will make it all the sweeter. You’re honest with yourself. That true self love and strength. You already have what most people want but too afraid or weak to acquire and hold. Keep doing you.

    Liked by 2 people


    • Wow thank you for your comment! Sorry I didn’t get back to you right away we went camping for 2 days! Yes I figured photoshop was a big thing but the steroids I never thought about. Makes sense. Since I’ve started blogging I feel great I feel better about a lot of aspects in my life. It means so much you even took the time to write to me. Another person messaged me and told me I should try yoga. So that’s what I’m going to do and we will see how it goes! Thanks, again !



  4. The accuracy! I have gained a shameful amount of weight since having my son and I yo-yo back and forth between obsessing over my weight and give absolutely zero fucks. It’s not called “happy weight” if you aren’t happy about it, right? So I should just make the best of it. Lol

    Liked by 1 person


    • Haha yes, I beat myself up all the time and do nothing about it. Honestly though in winter I lost weight and no matter what my mind will tell me it’s not good enough. One of my followers told me to try yoga and how much they love it, so I was going to this weekend and see if I could do it or enjoy it haha

      Liked by 1 person


      • We had an elliptical and that was my FAVORITE thing to do! I could put my headphones on and zone out for an hour easy… then the elliptical broke, as did my motivation! haha I hope you love it 🙂 zumba is a lot of fun to me!


    • Haha I definitely know what to do, but will I.. lol. This post makes me laugh every time I read it. See I’m not always talking about dark things. I can be funny hahahah



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